Do you ever just get tired of being sick?

Ok, so let me say right off that I do not recommend that anyone do what I am planning to do.  I strongly suggest following your Doctors orders.

That being said.  Do you ever just get so dang tired of being sick?   I’ve always been able to handle 99% of the pain and illness and whatever else this body from hell throws at me.  I am a very strong minded person.  I figure do what you will to my body but don’t mess with my mind.  I will find away around any obstacle you throw at me.

Well, since my surgery on Dec. 30th, I’ve come a very long ways.  About a week ago I started being nauseated.  I am nauseated as soon as I wake up until the time I can finally fall asleep.  I’ve lost over 20lbs in three weeks.  Which is awesome if I was actually trying to, but not so good when I’m losing it because I cannot eat.

I was told that the recovery time would be around 6 months for a normal person but because of my conditions it would take 8 -10 months.  Now I am not a very patient person when it comes to this.  I am use to having surgery and being up and walking the same day or evening.  Which I was this time as well much to the nurses dismay, but that’s another story.  I was released before the 24 hour mark even hit since the surgery took place, at my request.

I  was doing great, but now this nausea.  It’s kicking my butt.  Today it made me weak minded.  I’ve felt like crying all day and a few times I did.  Now I’m fed up.  Still nauseated but at least I am not being a whiney little sissy mary alice.

I am going to go against Doctors orders.  Starting tomorrow I am going to start taking my Grandson for walks.  I don’t care if I’m throwing up the entire way.  I am going to start doing something every day.  It will either land me in the hospital or speed up the recovery time.  8-10 months my ars.  I’m not having that.  I just can’t sit here and do nothing but “go with it”.    Sometimes I just get sick to death of being sick and have to do something, anything, right or wrong.

I see my hepatologist next Thursday so I don’t think I can do to much damage in a week.  Ok, ok I know that’s not true.  I can really screw myself up.  If I think I am doing more harm than good I will cease and desist.  ha ha ha.

I refuse to let this crap beat me down.  I refuse to let this make me weak of mind.

2 comments on “Do you ever just get tired of being sick?

  1. Reblogged this on womanwalkininfaith and commented:
    Equate protein shakes plus at wallie world, yogurt even on hugging the throne days usually will stay down…any and all vitamins make chewables or gummies easier to digest. NO matter what, keep trying to get fluids in and even nibble saltine crackers…lately I have even been using Nutella since it is a high protein spread. These are in my tool box daily. Take this from someone whom has been sick almost all her life and if I make it I may do one more birthday they said I would never see. But my saving Grace is just that…MY saving GRACE… I pray like a crazy woman, and I do not mean for myself. I remind myself I get to choose my own perspective, DAILY. If I don’t like it today, well I can take a nap and wake up with a new one (when all else fails) But you can #BeTheChange you need for your life….try prayer, it has kept me going far longer than the doctors have. Occasionally I have been known to remind a doctor even, that Today I did not pray to that doctor. You are not alone and will stay in my daily prayers…

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